Comments/Review

Favorite Quotes/Scenes

Marvin Ishelwood: "Look how big this is. You want me to stick this in my heart? Are you fucking nuts?!

Stanley Goodspeed: "The world is being Fed-Ex'ed to hell in a hand cart."

Carla: "Will you marry me?"
Stanley Goodspeed: "Whoa, hey, marriage police...pull over."

Tourist: "What kind of fucked up tour is this?!"

Ranger Bob: "I am not allowed to carry a gun."
Tourist: Oh, you're not allowed to carry a gun. I got a goddamn gun. If I'd known this was gonna happen I'd of brought my motherfuckin' gun. Help!!"

FBI Agent: "He's not gonna hit the streets, Jim. 30 years ago he was a highly trained SAS operative. He's my age now for Christ's sake....I have to get up three times a night to take a piss!"

Special Agent Ernest Paxton: "I'm Special Agent in charge Ernest Paxton."
John Mason: "In charge of what...fucking me over for another 3 decades?"
Special Agent Ernest Paxton: "I don't know anything about your previous matters. I'm here because a special situation exists that we feel you might be able to help us with."
John Mason: "Now what might that be? I've been in jail longer than Nelson Mandela, so maybe you want me to run for President."

Motorcycle Rider: "Hey Man, you just fucked up your Ferrari."
Stanley Goodspeed: "It's not mine."

Stanley Goodspeed: "What do you say we cut the chit-chat a-hole! You almost got me killed twice and my jaw hurts like hell."

Stanley Goodspeed: "My stomach's doing hula-hoops around my ass."

Stanley Goodspeed: "Are you, uh, enjoying this?"
John Mason: "It's certainly more enjoyable than my average day. Reading philosophy...avoiding gang rape in the washroom...though it's less of a problem these days. Maybe I'm losing my sex appeal."

John Mason: "You sure you're ready for this."
Stanley Goodspeed: "I'll do my best."
John Mason: "Your best?! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
Stanley Goodspeed: "Carla was the prom queen."

Stanley Goodspeed: "You've been around a lot of corpses. Is that normal?"
John Mason: "What, the feet thing?"
Stanley Goodspeed: "Yeah, the feet thing."
John Mason: "Yeah, that happens."
Stanley Goodspeed: "Well, I'm having kind of a hard time concentrating. Can you do something about it?"
John Mason: "Like what? Kill him again?"

John Mason: "I was trained by the best...British Intelligence. But in retrospect I'd rather have been a poet or farmer."

Soldier One: "You're lucky that old man Hummel wants you alive..."
Soldier Two: "Cause I'd take pleasure in guttin' you boy."

Stanley Goodspeed: "Listen, I think we got started off on the wrong foot. Stan Goodspeed, FBI. Uh, Let's talk music. Do you like the Elton John song Rocket Man?
Soldier: "I don't like soft ass shit."
Stanley Goodspeed: "Well I only bring it up because it's you. You're the rocket man...(fires rocket) How do you like how that shit works?"